Monday, November 11, 2013

ANOTHER TOUGH SET OF DAYS

It has been a very difficult 2 weeks since the vitreous detachment in my good eye. Trying to adjust to the shadows and the blur and the "busyness" in my field of vision has taken me off my game. I am trying to learn a new normal, but the pleasure in reading or walking or driving or movies is quite limited. 

The specialist said nothing new. There is a surgery they can do which is 98% effective in helping reduce the floating vitreous, however, if you are in the 2% with a bad outcome, it would be far worse. Let's just say my odds for health have not been that great in the past 3 years. He wants me to see if my brain can do any accommodating to it first. It would be a tough decision, even at 98%. (Plus, most people who have it done need cataract surgery within 2 years)

On the heels of that, I had 8 days of bad stomach pain and pleurisy to deal with. Both of those things have cleared up for the most part, so I am left now with just trying to live this new life with limited clear vision. 

Sometimes I think that I have had my share, thank you very much, of attacks and problems, and I wish it would all just stop already. But I need to deal with what is.

I know God is my Healer and I have given Him yet another issue to heal, and to get glory from. I do not know His timing, but my faith is steadfast. Jesus was, after all, an eye healer. His specialty was blindness and eye disorders, so my faith is in the right person.

It is in the waiting on Him that I need strength and courage, and feel I have had little of both the past 2 weeks.

How I wished I had thanked the Lord every day of my life for my vision.

2 comments:

Cole said...

:) I've been praying specifically for your strength and stamina as you courageously face these foes knowing Jesus is on your side in this battle. I can't imagine the frustration you have but I'm so thankful you've taken the right perspective-that it's yet another thing to bring God glory when He does heal you. Trusting and praying with you, Mare! Love you!!

Rachel J said...

I have been praying for you as well, sweet Aunt. I get so frustrated with the seemingly endless needs from four little ones who are always needing...something.

I think about our Savior and how he had to trust what his father in heaven was doing, even as He was being ridiculed by those who said he was a joke. Would his fathers will really be accomplished? Was he himself believing a lie?

This all must be so tough...and draining. So much of what you enjoy and do depends on your eyesight...I mean, it's that way for all of us!

I know the day to day journey feels so awful and long. A day at a time...it's all any of us can do, right?