There are too many of my Christian brothers and sisters in Christ reading this blog for me not to share with you the specifics of prayer needed right now.
My tumors are growing and multiplying. We were not prepared for this. The shortness of breath is due to one of the new tumors around the pulmonary artery and the bronchus.....this is not good, folks.
The chemo I have been on for 2 years, daily, is no longer effective. The cancer cells get smart and start adapting to it. It is clear that the metastases are aggressive, as I had a good PET scan June 1st. This all happened as I sat in a blueberry patch and filled my bucket this summer.
I will know more on Tuesday after another appointment with a radiation doctor to see if they think they can do any radiation on any of these lesions. For now, I am beginning a new chemo drug on Wednesday, one just off clinical trials. The side effects are potentially many. The ones that concern me are always nausea and vomiting and diarrhea because if I cannot eat or lose any weight, I am in a world of hurt. I no longer have an ounce more to lose. Fatigue is another, and this concerns me as well, as I want to keep working.
If they can do any radiation, it would be every day for weeks. This means an hour commute to Sioux Falls every day. That wears me out just thinking about it. But we'll know that on Tuesday.
My soul has taken a battering on this. I cannot even fathom that this is the beginning of the end. I know I must regain my footing for faith in healing. I have not heard from God that He is not going to heal me. His promises have not changed since Thursday morning. I have not heard from Him that this is my time to lay down the sword. So I need to get my faith back. It has taken a punch.
But I have an amazing group of supporters around me who are standing in total faith with me, most of all Dick, who has been my rock and preacher, and Sam, who refuses to give up any hope that healing will happen. Cole, Susan, Mary Ruth, Sandy, Julie, Rachel.......THANK YOU. Please hold tight for me until I can get my gear back on. If we give up now, satan wins, and 4 years of faith will be for naught.
Satan does not want me healed. That I know. John 10:10 is clear that he is out to kill, steal and destroy my life. On Thursday when I told my best friend Susan the news, she went outside to her backyard to sit and pray for me, and when she prays, SHE PRAYS. Suddenly, a horde of wasps started attacking her (wasps do not attack without provocation). She started running for house and 3 of them even got into her house. She was badly stung 5 times. She said, "Mary, it felt like the devil himself....it was clear to me that he did NOT want me to pray for your healing." The devil wants to win this.
For those of you who pray for me, I ask you for two things right now: that I would expereince NO side effects from the new drug, and could continue to eat-----and that my heart and soul would find its way back to my Healer God, Jehovah Rapha. He gets NO glory from cancer, but He gets ALL the glory for healing me, and I still believe that is His will. Pray that I would FEEL again what I KNOW in my mind is true from Scripture.
Thank you in advance for approaching the Throne of God and interceding for me.