Monday, December 16, 2013


Dick and I just returned from our oncology appointment getting the PET scan results from last week. We always go in expecting God will show His hand with divine healing, and we will never waver from that expectation because we believe it will happen. So anything less than that is always initially a bit of a disappointment.

That said, we are encouraged that my tumor has not grown since January, and the metabolic uptake has decreased 25% so the cancer activity has been tamed a bit. All positive news. For a Plan B, we'll take it!! God is good. ALL THE TIME!!

After 4 weeks of viral bronchitis, I am finally well with only a bit of a lingering cough which may last for a couple more weeks, but I finally have gained some stamina back and hope to make a complete recovery. I am trying my best to gain back part of the 5 pounds I lost over the past 2 weeks, but I am highly unsuccessful at that task. Why don't they write books about weight GAIN???

Sam comes home for his break on Thursday night and we couldn't be happier that the family will be all together for a few weeks!


Rachel J said...


Anonymous said...

Wonderful news Mary !

Anonymous said...

I get that you are afraid and clinging to the idea of god to bring you comfort, but I want to tell you that you can be strong, fight the good fight, and be an inspiration to others without hiding out in a fantasy world of religion.

The upside to living in reality is that you can actually give yourself credit for your own strength and not get caught up in pretending your life is at the mercy of a supreme being standing to issue a thumbs-up or down.

The reason the concept of god was invented in the first place was to try to bring meaning, purpose, and comfort to a primitive culture that didn't understand the world -- even simple concepts, such as why the sun and moon rise and fall each day -- and it worked for centuries because most people were uneducated and ignorant. But as soon as people started educating themselves, religious began to lose favor.

So now we understand the world in ways that we didn't back when the bible was written -- we're not ignorant anymore. And while we certainly don't have answers for everything, we have lots of answers that were unknowable back when things like disease would ravage a community and we had no choice but to chalk it up to some unknown power.

It's no coincidence that one element every religion on earth has in common is the concept of life after death. The men who created gods recognized that the greatest fear known to mankind was the fear of death. People were dying all the time and no one knew why -- but everyone was afraid that it could happen to them next. So these "wise men" understood the importance of offering eternal life in exchange for obedience and conformity. In other words, it was a very clever and effective means of controlling the masses. And it still works to a large extent today.

Yes, the world is chaotic and random at times, and there are no good answers for a lot of things, but take comfort in knowing that you have love in your life. That's the most important thing. And also know that you don't need to believe in god in order to live a good life, be a decent and compassionate human being, and support and love others. God is not a prerequisite to good things but, I would argue, devotion to a master can take away your sense of self-worth and autonomy. In other words, I think you will find you have more energy and more determination for the adversity ahead when you own your power and recognize that no amount of fearful praying will magically turn things around.

Wherever your fight takes you, consider not being a slave to a master god, and instead urge yourself to take full responsibility for your life. I think you will find yourself feeling more empowered and fulfilled when you don't have to bow down in gratitude to a master for every shred of goodness in your life.

Good luck with your illness. I hope you can learn to live in your power.