Monday, February 21, 2011


I just got home from chemo. I ended up needing my 1 primary chemo drug and 3 secondary drugs plus a B-12 injection. The infusion nurse had a vein collapse on the first try, but got in on the second, so with blood work and B-12, I, who really hate needles, had 4 stabs today. Sigh. 

We went over my digital scans of the PET, and after Dr. V spoke with the radiologist here about them, there is some thought now that what they saw as a new nodule on the lower lung could be infection or inflammation instead of a tumor. It really changes nothing, whether it is cancerous or infectious. I refuse to have another CT scan to determine that because my treatment choice is not going to change, and it makes no difference in the long haul. They will keep an eye on it over the next months.

Dick came with me today, which was SO nice (and doubly sweet that he did because today is a holiday for him and he could have spent it doing what he wanted at home). He has had a really heavy teaching load since my very first treatment and hasn’t been able to come, but it was great having him sit there. We didn’t even talk much, but his presence covers me like a warm blanket. He was busy studying his Spanish for his upcoming trip to Dominican Republic in 5 weeks.

Had a fun road trip with Sam to Minneapolis. The Wild gave him a great game and they put up a W. He and Billy had excellent seats and he said it really is so different than watching it on TV… person you actually know who has the puck at all times.

I had a wonderful visit with Gretchen and got to meet precious Jack. It sure transports me back 19 years to those first days and weeks of falling more deeply in love by the hour with this tiny life you are now responsible for. When I looked into Gretchen’s eyes, shimmering with awe and sleeplessness and unspeakable love, and watched the tenderness and devotion in how she cares for him, I know that even though she is on the new-parent learning curve right now, she’s all over this mothering job, and in a few short weeks, she’ll have it all down. It is so special to see her as a mom!

Please pray that I might avoid or have minimal side effects from this chemo round!

Amanda, thank you, my friend, for the cards you have sent that always, always, instinctively arrive on pivotal days for me. You have been in my shoes and I know you “get” all of what this journey holds. Your thoughtfulness touches me so much.


Anonymous said...

It was so good to read your blog this morning. I thought so much about you and how the new chemo would be. Hope so much that it will be more tolerable than the last one. Not anything new except Mae and Pat are coming in on Friday for her brother's funeral on Saturday.
. They will be able to spend Sunday with us....C and M and Lo and Pricilla will be leaving Sunday morning for a trip. You arein my constant prayers..Loving you always, Mom

Anonymous said...

It was so wonderful to see you and Sam! Thank you for making the trip. And thank you so much for your kind words. I think it's the greatest compliment I could receive to have it be said that I'm a good mom. I've never cared about anything more, so it means so much.
Love you past the moon!