SATURDAY AT DORDT

     Since Sam can't come home for his birthday next weekend, we went over to Dordt on Saturday to take him out to dinner and give him his gifts. After listening to his webcasts for over a year, it was great fun to actually SEE him do a broadcast in person. There was a bitter cold north wind on Saturday, and luckily, we not only had Sam's winter coat in the car to take to him, but an old quilt as well. He and color commentator Jeremy did their best to keep warm and they did a great job on the soccer game. Fun day!

      Unless another Dordt sporting event preempts it, Sam will be going to Chicago with the varsity men's basketball team and making his radio debut broadcasting their games there in a couple of weeks. I'll post his broadcast times when the time gets closer in case you want to tune into 88.5!!!

ALL'S WELL

My chemo session went well and aside from some nausea, especially when I exert myself, I am feeling fine. Am just going to lay low for a day or two.....take walks and read books....and not try to tackle yard work or anything. My infusion nurse got me on the first stick. THANKS FOR THOSE PRAYERS!! It took her a long time to get the vein to stay "up," but she finally got the needle in before it flattened out and it was a good stick. I am meeting tomorrow with my friend Mary Ruth about my book. I want her to read the first draft and give me any spiritual pointers she has about anything I have misrepresented or omitted in writing about divine healing. I so value her input. Better go get some chicken and dumplings cookin' for our dinner.

CHEMO TOMORROW

It's that time again. All I can think about is how many needle sticks I will have to have to insert the catheter. I won't see my doctor tomorrow...have to see his nurse practitioner .... don't know her....we'll see how that goes. Had a good productive weekend alone while Dick was at his state conference. Had 3 good friends over for Friday girls-night-out and did alot of laughing. Jill, Angie, and Karol, you're the best!! Got laundry and cleaning done on Saturday, and got outside windows washed before Dick got home today. Got 3 books ready and waiting for the next 4 sleepless-on-steroids nights. And so the week starts.....

NEW CRITTER IN THE HOUSE

 Sam's big bad bass (caught this summer) finally arrived, mounted on a piece of driftwood. The taxidermist did a great job of showing that huge mouth! Glad we didn't eat him!!

REALITY CHECK

Dick and I refused to read any lung cancer literature after my diagnosis. I did not want to hear anything about it. I knew only that the average survival after diagnosis was about 16 months. They say knowledge is power. In this case, knowledge meant depression. I wanted no medical prognostications. Because those numbers do not conform to the work of a Creator and a Healer. But on a walk this week, I casually said to Dick, "I wonder what the numbers really are." He said, "After your last PET scan, I looked up the stats. Do you want to know what they are?" Finally, I could hear the numbers. So here is my reality check.

For stage 4 non-small-cell lung cancer:

69% of patients are alive after 6 months.
44% of patients are alive after one year.
29% of patients are alive after 18 months.

All glory to God that I am in that 44%!!!

HI AGAIN

I had to take a little "station break" from my blog for a while and deal with some dire medical issues. None related to cancer. I had a kidney stone----the pain from which was worse than any childbirth experience----and then another altogether different issue, which at the risk of giving TMI, I will simply say, made me want to choose kidney stone pain. The issues are resolved, and I am still in one piece. 


My son came home for an overnight on Saturday, though considering he spent hours working on a philosophy paper about "Are We More Than DNA?", we did not actually spend much time visiting. It made me remember that I never did like philosophy!! We did his laundry,  filled him up with "real food," topped off his gas tank, and sent him back to Dordt life. The house still feels empty without him. It probably always will. 


I am busy working on my booklet about divine healing.....all of the Scriptural truths I have studied and researched and learned about this year. I am so pleased with how smoothly it is all coming together, and I hope to complete it sometime in November. There is so much that people don't know about God's will in healing....things I surely did not know until desperation made me search for them. I pray as I write that there will be others who might find truth and faith in my words, and be set on healing paths.


Thanks to my blog readers who continue to check for posts even through long absences!! I continue to be humbled that anyone cares to read my random thoughts.

Baby Girl

I had to post a pic of my beautiful new great-niece, Phoebe. She is the answer to so many prayers....

Phoebe is the newest in a line of great-nieces which include Carina, Ivy, and Lucy, all precocious, sweet, and just as adorable as Phoebe, with amazing role models in their respective moms, my nieces Allison and Rachel.

We are anxious to get down to Kansas City one of these weekends to see them all!

TREASURE

     I drove to Minneapolis this weekend to see my sister (not by blood, but by heart) Susan, who flew in from Atlanta for a family wedding. She is the friend who knows EVERYTHING about me, and loves me anyway. She is the friend who has walked with me through the worst that life has thrown at me. She speaks the truth in love, and is as real as humans can be. What you see with my Susan is what you get. Our time together is always not enough, but it was time. Miles may separate us, but our souls are ever-connected.

REAR VIEW MIRROR

Reflections as I look back on the news of my PET scan.....


Several people have asked me since if I am still flying high. The truth is, I am not, and I never was. First of all, I was on steroids, which means I did not sleep for 4 nights and sleep deprivation sort of takes the tap out of the tapping shoes. It is hard to exhibit ebullience when you are a zombie. Secondly, though, and more cogent of a reason, is that it was not a surprise. It did not shock us. It was what our faith has taught us to expect. 


Did we expect that one of the tumors would be healed completely? Not necessarily. And we are very humbly grateful for all of it. But the good report was what we have been standing on in faith for a year. If it had surprised us, it really would have told us that we didn't believe in divine healing as much as we have said we do. So, while the news produced a quiet track of tears down Dick's and my faces, there were no screams and shouts, no shock, no being blown away by what God had already promised us.


Our belief needs to stay strong, for Satan is so eager to get his hands into our business and convince us that this is all a fluke. We know his MO and we are poised to rebuke him at every turn. He, author of disease, would like nothing more than to reverse all of this news or make us think that it is all coming back to me in time. He has no power in this home.


Life rolls on.......I still have cancer........but news is encouraging......I am getting some good hours working (to pay for the cancer care!!)......our days have been in the 80's......I guess that means life is good.

TOO WEAK FOR BATTLE

     I am always struck by how often I hear, "She or he is battling cancer." And every time I hear it, I think to myself, I am awed by people who can do that. How inadequate I really feel to battle something as big as the big C. I simply don't have the inner strength and energy for it. That war puts wrinkles and white hair where they shouldn't be. It saps my well-being and my quality of life. Battling it alone writes fear all over my face and pours panic in my gut. The battle is simply too much for me. That is my truth.
     But I am grateful to be able to say that I don't have to. My God has made it clear that my battles are His. And I have always loved the story in 2 Chronicles 20 which taught me this.
     Many of you know this well-loved story. Jehoshaphat, king of Judah, was informed that the vast armies of Moab, Ammon and Mount Seir were approaching to "make war" on the Judean king and his people. The Bible tells us that he asked the people of Judah to come together to seek the Lord. 
     The king cries out to God, asking God to remember His promise to drive out all inhabitants of the promised land. "If calamity comes upon us, we will sit in your presence and you will hear us and save us. But now men from Ammon, Moab and Seir are coming to drive us out of the possession you gave us as an inheritance. Oh, our God, will not judge them? For we have no power to face this vast army that is attacking us. We do not know what to do, BUT OUR EYES ARE UPON YOU." 
     Then God spoke to the gathered crowd through a man named Jahaziel. In verse 15, Jahaziel says, "Listen, King Jeohoshaphat, and all you who live in Judah and Jerusalem. This is what the Lord says to you: 'Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. FOR THE BATTLE IS NOT YOURS, BUT GOD'S! YOU will NOT have to fight this battle. Take up your positions, stand firm, and see the deliverance the Lord will give you. Go out to face [the enemy] tomorrow and the Lord will be with you.'"
     Jehoshaphat and his people bowed down before the Lord and praised him.
     The next morning as they left for battle, some of the men went out at the head of the army singing and praising God saying:
                     "Give thanks to the Lord,
                     For His love endures forever."
     And if you remember the story, you know the amazing victory they claimed. The armies of the 3 enemies slaughtered and annihilated each other. The battle, indeed, belonged to the Lord. He did it all. The Judean army only had to take their positions, believe that God's promises would be kept, and wait for the armies to rise up against each other.
     My enemy has a name: stage 4 lung cancer. Too big for me. Too strong for me. A battle I cannot fight because it would overwhelm me. But praise Jesus, I don't have to. My Father, my Healer, my Redeemer, battles for me. My eyes are upon Him, I have taken up my position......that of unwavering faith in His promises to continue to heal me......and I wait for my full deliverance.


     Praise to the Lord, for He is good. His mercy endures forever, and His love is everlasting.

ANNIVERSARY

 HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, RICHIE!!

       I love you more today, 28 years later, than I did on the autumn morning we said our vows to each other. Thanks for being my best friend, my anchor, and keeper of my dreams. Thanks for being such an amazing husband and father. Marrying you was the best decision I ever made! This past year has tested our bond beyond what we could have ever imagined, but we are even stronger, aren't we? Second only to my Jesus, YOU are my rock and my fortress here on earth, and the reason I am living my life and starting to heal. Without your solid faith pasted onto mine, I would not be able to walk this cancer path. I love you to the moon and back, Babe!

Our October 1 wedding in Duluth

Our honeymoon in Bermuda, taken before our arms and legs were black and blue
with bruises after crashing our motorcycle into a stone wall (a story for another time)!!!!